People get deeply uncomfortable when you say you have not forgiven your abuser and do not plan to. Not because you are wrong, but because it forces them to confront how badly abuse has been minimised in our culture. The second you say, “I don’t forgive her,” people start scrambling to tidy it up for themselves. Suddenly they need to explain healing to you. They need to tell you that you are carrying anger, carrying hate, carrying pain. They need to believe forgiveness is the

Today marks 11 years since I went no contact with my narcissistic mother. Eleven years since I made the hardest, bravest, most life-changing decision of my life. Eleven years since I chose myself. I call it my Independence Day . Not in sadness or regret, but in celebration; a recognition of my strength, my healing and how far I've come. November 21, 2014. I can still remember the weight in my chest, the fear, the guilt, the voice in my head screaming that I was making a terr